JUST FUCKING USE…

THE SITES, YOU LAZY FUCKS

Just Fucking Use HTML

The original legend. Peak web experience.

Just Fucking Use React

The inevitable counterattack.

Just Fucking Use CSS

Because sometimes HTML alone looks like ass.

Just Fucking Use HTTP

HTML is for pussies. Plain text fucks harder.

Just Fucking Use Rails

Convention over configuration, you indecisive prick.

Just Fucking Use Laravel

Fuck your custom framework circlejerk.

Just Fucking Use Docker

End the "it works on my machine" crying forever.

Just Fucking Use AI

Stop whining and start prompting, coward.

Just Fucking Use Tailwind

Fuck naming classes like a drunk raccoon.

Just Fucking Use Effect

Try-catch is a war crime. Get type-safe FP without the dependency bloat.

Just Fucking Use Angular

Fuck your 2016 trauma. Modern Angular is standalone, signals-powered, and actually fucking good.

Just Fucking Use nuqs

Your URL state is a fucking disaster.

Just Fucking Use Postgres

NoSQL for your CRUD app? Fucking delusional.

Just Fucking Use Astro

Most sites are static content, not apps. Stop over-engineering, idiot.

Just Fucking Use Expo

Stop torturing yourself with CocoaPods, Gradle, and Xcode bullshit.

Just Fucking Use Cursor

Your Neovim config isn't shipping products. Cursor's AI is. Stop tweaking and start building.

Just Fucking Use Go

Fuck borrow checkers, OOMs, and the GIL. Go compiles fast, ships one binary, scales with goroutines. Stop suffering.

Just Fucking Use Microservices

Real engineers enjoy debugging distributed race conditions at 3 AM.

Just Fucking Use Claude Code

Real testimonials from devs who stopped debating and started shipping.

Just Fucking Use Copilot

Your company's already paying for it. Stop expensing another subscription, you absolute walnut.

Just Fucking Use Nano Banana

Google's best image AI is free and named by a PM at 2:30 AM. You're still paying for Midjourney.

Just Fucking Use Cloudflare

Stop paying SEVENTEEN DIFFERENT BILLS for your shitty todo app.

Just Fucking Use Gemini

Google invented the Transformer. Then took a 5-year nap. Then woke up and chose violence.

Just Fucking Use Cron

You don't need a workflow engine, a message bus, and three YAML priests. You need a fucking timer.

Just Fucking Use Plain Text

Markdown lasts forever. Your proprietary bullshit rots in five years. Choose wisely.

Just Fucking Use SharePoint

Yes, it sucks. No, you're not special. Your company already paid for it. Deal with it.

Just Fucking Use Standards

Reinventing wheels is not innovation. It's untreated ego.

Just Fucking Use UTC

Local timezones turn midnight into a surprise orgy of bugs. UTC keeps your timestamps sane and your ass out of timezone hell.

Just Fucking Use AWS

Stop pretending you're gonna self-host or multi-cloud your MVP. AWS has everything. Just deploy and stop overcomplicating your life, dipshit.

Just Fucking Use Kotlin

Null pointers and boilerplate are for masochists. Kotlin fixes Java's bullshit while staying interoperable.

Just Fucking Use Lottie

Your animations are bloated GIFs or janky CSS hacks that look like shit on half the platforms. Lottie is vector, smooth, and works everywhere from one file.

Just Fucking Use Brain

It's time to stop. It's time to decouple. It's time to think.

Just Fucking Use DeepSeek

China built GPT-4 for $6M while OpenAI burned billions. Your API costs just mass-extinction-evented themselves.

Just Fucking Use Figma

Adobe tried to buy them for $20B. DOJ said no. Adobe paid $1B for losing. Figma's still goated.

Just Fucking Use Perplexity

Google's search is 90% ads. Perplexity actually answers questions. Yes, they're getting sued. No, you shouldn't care.

Just Fucking Use What You Want

Why should you let others tell you what to use? Make your own decisions like a FUCKING MAN.

Just Fucking Stop Already

The meta killshot. Tools aren't religion. Context matters. Stop preaching like cult leaders.